thecatsme0w: (hate)
One sunny day in 2005 an old man approached the
> White
> House from across Pennsylvania Avenue, where he'd
> been
> sitting on a park bench. He spoke to the U.S. Marine
>
> standing guard and said, "I would like to go in and
> meet
> with President Bush."
>
> The Marine looked at the man and said, "Sir, Mr.
> Bush
> is no longer president and no longer resides here."
>
> The old man said, "Okay" and walked away.
>
> The following day, the same man approached the White
> House and said to the same Marine, "I would like to
> go
> in and meet with President Bush."
>
> The Marine again told the man, "Sir, Mr. Bush is no
> longer
> president and no longer resides here." The man
> thanked him
> and, again, just walked away.
>
> The third day, the same man approached the White
> House and
> spoke to the very same U. S. Marine, saying "I would
> like
> to go in and meet with President Bush."
>
> The Marine, understandably agitated at this
> point,looked
> at the man and said, "Sir, this is the third day in
> a row
> you have been here asking to speak to Mr. Bush. I've
> told
> you already that Mr. Bush is no longer the president
> and
> no longer resides here. Don't you understand?"
>
> The old man looked at the Marine and said, "Oh, I
> understand. I just love hearing it."
>
> The Marine snapped to attention, saluted, and said,
> "See you tomorrow."
>
> MAKE IT HAPPEN - VOTE
thecatsme0w: (Default)
Larry wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Larry looks around the room and sees that it is in a perfect order, spotless, clean. So's the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table, "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you."

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Larry asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

His son says, "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door."

Confused, Larry asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off you said, "Lady leave me alone, I'm married!"

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